Bob Wake Up We Fell Asleep on the Couch Again
Media Platforms Design Team
The beginning time two people slumber together is fraught with anxiety. But the starting time fourth dimension two people sleep together—like jammies, warm milk, and counting sheep—is just as nerve-wracking.
If beingness naked with someone means exposing yourself, existence asleep next to them is the ultimate vulnerability. Here are nine thoughts almost guys (especially anxious ones) have the start time they contemplate sharing a bed with a woman for the unabridged night.
1. Why Is She On My Side?
Are you territorial well-nigh your side of the bed? Co-ordinate to math, there's a fifty/l take chances that your new sleepover friend prefers the same side. Well, unless he or she likes to sleep at the pes of the bed like a puppy. Either style, this can create some existent tension and makes the mail service-coital roll to your side very important. Information technology'southward the easiest fashion to stake out a spot.
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2. Why Aren't We Cuddling?
The starting time fourth dimension you sleep with someone reveals something crucial: how y'all actually sleep. People have dissimilar methods. Are you a breadbasket, border-of-the-bed, don't-freakin'-touch-me type? Because that can send a pretty cruel unintentional message. Are yous a cuddle-monster looking for something with a pulse to supersede your childhood teddy bear? That might be merely every bit bad for a guy who needs his sleep space. Information technology's a frail dance of accidental touching and limbs falling asleep.
3. Am I Moving Around Also Much?
For anxious types only. If you're a tossing-and-turning sleeper, you lot may only piss the hell out of someone who needs perfect stillness to fall asleep. If she ends up kicking you in the ribs, chances are you are not being invited dorsum.
four. What If I Snore? Wait, What If She Snores?
Snoring is annoying. People who snore the first time they slumber over are not often asked to return. Guys definitely don't want to lose out on future sex just because they've got weird sinus problems. They also don't want to lose out on precious slumber because a new lady friend sounds similar someone trying to start a lawnmower with a chainsaw within an echo sleeping room. #StopSleepApnea2015
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5. What If I Talk in My Sleep?
People do weird stuff while they're asleep. Revealing weird truths through unconscious mumbling is high on that listing. Some sleep-talk can be kinda beautiful. But if you lot tend to think near murders or channel demons while in dreamland, you may wake up to a grown adult female thrusting a Bible and a handful of garlic in your face.
6. What If I Pee the Bed?
So what if yous oasis't done information technology since you were 6 years old? It would be simply your luck if it happened this evening of all nights. Also, you drank, like, eight low-cal beers, and they run through you. Plus, she has a fish tank in her bedroom, and the filter sounds like a waterfall...ugh, better pee one more time before bed. Notation: This rule applies to all involuntary actual functions because our bodies are disgusting bags of meat designed to create bad smells at the almost inopportune times.
vii. Is She Still Breathing?
I swear I accept this idea sometimes: "Homo, she sure is still when she sleeps... peradventure too still. That shrimp we ate tasted funny. I heard that if y'all drinkable red and white wine in the aforementioned dark, y'all can spontaneously stop breathing. What's the rule with CPR—chest compressions and then assisted breathing, or is it the reverse? Better check my phone...Oh, oh! Sorry sweetie, the light from my phone woke you upwards."
8. Are We Gonna Practise It Again In The Morning?
If the commencement time you lot have sex activity coincides with the first sleepover, this is the top thought in any guy'southward heed. It can keep a guy upwardly all nighttime, literally and figuratively. If yous don't do it again the side by side morning, does that mean she thinks yous were bad the dark before? These thoughts will block out any endeavor at sleeping until the sun comes up the side by side morning time. Oh expect, she seems to be feeling a footling frisky...
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ix. What's Her Policy On Forenoon Kisses?
Ugh, is my breath rank? Does she have an extra toothbrush? Nope. See, this is why you always brought a toothbrush to sleepovers in middle school. Guys just never larn.
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Evan Scott Schwartz is a writer from New York City.
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Source: https://www.womenshealthmag.com/relationships/a19904547/actually-sleeping-together-for-first-time/
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